Shop Mobile More Submit  Join Login
.

i pulled a napkin from the silver tin,
wiped the table clear, drops of ketchup staining the center.
i crushed the paper in my palm, felt the dampness reach the edges.

hurt cloud, she said as i let it roll across the table.

.

shooting baskets as the day ended,
the ball went over the backboard, disappeared into the dark.
she shrugged, then bent low, picked up pebbles.
aimed
and threw.

.

your poor hands, she said.  you have so many scars,
and you're still so young.  (she, younger than i, saying this)

she touched one hand, then after a pause she took the other
without looking at me.

some things take so much courage.

we sat like that for a long time,
perfectly
still.

.

i passed two old women by the river.
one stopped, pulled off her shoe
and shook a pebble out.

it dropped into the water
and she continued on,
limping slightly
from the absence dented into her foot.

the other had stopped a ways ahead.
she waited and said, a pebble?

the woman nodded. her whole life
having led her there, she was carried
away again.

.

a memory:  the night i was married,
while everyone danced and ate beneath the lights,
i kept my fingers on my bride's knee beneath the table.
the fabric of her dress and the skin beneath slid when i moved my hand.

her bone flashing white, her shape gathering in the hardness,
so white it ached, so hard it changed.

i covered my face with my other hand.
when she saw she put her hand on my knee
and we were really married
then.

.

my dog stopped eating, only took morsels.  her ribs became prominent.
it made me wince to run my hand over the sharp ridge of her spine.

her belly grew, and became hard.
at the clinic, the vet knelt down to inspect her.

he pressed on her sides and stayed like that
for a minute.  she looked at me, then stared at the floor.

there is a tumor in her abdomen, it has grown quite large.
he rose, folded his hands and spoke gently.  
there is nothing we can do.

okay, i said.
something hard stuck in my throat,
kept me from swallowing.

.

there is one window i keep open no matter what.
it faces west, toward the river you can hear
but not see.

there is a row of stones on the windowsill,
small forms that are a relief, hard and anonymous
and ancient.

i sit and run my fingers back and forth over them.
they wobble and dance, then recover.

with a breeze,
the curtains open and close

around the stones i've found.

the stones i've kept
without knowing
why.

.
sometimes things get so hard you can feel their shape, the weight of them, the way things form around them.

sometimes all you're walking on are memories.
Add a Comment:
 
:iconthegreatspyexperim:
TheGreatSpyExperim Featured By Owner Nov 9, 2012  Student Writer
This is amazing.
Reply
:icondreamsinstatic:
dreamsinstatic Featured By Owner Aug 17, 2012
Your amazing work has been featured in Friday Night Features.
Reply
:iconarchelyxs:
archelyxs Featured By Owner Aug 14, 2012
Secrets.
Reply
:iconantonfrost:
antonfrost Featured By Owner Aug 15, 2012   Writer
Terse
Tree(s)
Crest(s)
Sect
Tress
Scree
Ere
Crete
See(r)
Rest
Sere
Cress
Set
:Heart:
Reply
:icontelestic:
Telestic Featured By Owner Aug 14, 2012  Hobbyist Photographer
Love this one man, nice write :]
Reply
:iconantonfrost:
antonfrost Featured By Owner Aug 14, 2012   Writer
thanks
Reply
:icontelestic:
Telestic Featured By Owner Aug 14, 2012  Hobbyist Photographer
Featured as a favourite in this group: [link] :]
Reply
:iconcristinewakesuphappy:
cristinewakesuphappy Featured By Owner Aug 14, 2012  Hobbyist Writer
i like the poem as much as i like the description: sometimes things get so hard you can feel their shape, the weight of them, the way things form around them. sometimes all you're walking on are memories.

i don't think like is enough. i admire your poem. :bow:
Reply
:iconantonfrost:
antonfrost Featured By Owner Aug 14, 2012   Writer
i'm glad you enjoy it.
Reply
:iconsammur-amat:
Sammur-amat Featured By Owner Aug 13, 2012   General Artist
Ugggh, this is excruciating and gorgeous at the same time. Wonderful, wonderful piece:heart:
Reply
:iconforestmeetwildfire:
forestmeetwildfire Featured By Owner Aug 8, 2012  Hobbyist Writer
this is so honest and painful, i love it.
Reply
:iconantonfrost:
antonfrost Featured By Owner Aug 8, 2012   Writer
i'm glad you like it. :heart:
Reply
:iconpiscesandthediamonds:
Piscesandthediamonds Featured By Owner Aug 7, 2012  Hobbyist Writer
oh my :heart: I can feel the sharp pains and the widespread weight...memories, as bright and heavy as the moon :heart: borrowing light from the lit up past. I love the creativity of the girl in the first two strophes: "hurt cloud" and thowing pebbles. 4th strophe is my favourite - such beautiful pain :heart: sigh :)
Reply
:iconantonfrost:
antonfrost Featured By Owner Aug 8, 2012   Writer
:heart:
Reply
:iconmeghan-solo:
meghan-solo Featured By Owner Aug 5, 2012
seven in one.
doesn't that mean something?
the number seven?

i forget.

:heart: faved
Reply
:iconantonfrost:
antonfrost Featured By Owner Aug 6, 2012   Writer
seven:

one and one

and one and

one and one

and one and

one.

:heart:
Reply
:iconmeghan-solo:
meghan-solo Featured By Owner Aug 6, 2012
kind of amazing hey
Reply
:iconantonfrost:
antonfrost Featured By Owner Aug 6, 2012   Writer
no, no. it's "hay."

if you're going to write me from a barn, at least get your random outbursts right.

:heart:
Reply
:iconmeghan-solo:
meghan-solo Featured By Owner Aug 6, 2012
BAAAAAAA!!
Reply
:iconantonfrost:
antonfrost Featured By Owner Aug 7, 2012   Writer
:heart:
Reply
:iconkaitforest:
KaitForest Featured By Owner Aug 5, 2012   Writer
i love this so, so much

her bone flashing white, her shape gathering in the hardness,
so white it ached, so hard it changed.


especially that bit
god, just all of it
i want to write it down and keep it forever
Reply
:iconantonfrost:
antonfrost Featured By Owner Aug 6, 2012   Writer
oh, forever.
i think of those moments we wish would last forever,
or at least "long enough." such feelings. loves and sorrows and waves of rippling light that are an outpouring, immense washes of white rain. the whole world in them. lifetimes in them. surging waters and purple stones and birds that never touch the ground.

it's just occurring to me
that maybe that's what i've meant all along when i've said "forever."

simply "long enough."

there is something so sad
in the meagerness of our true wants, something so small, so simple,
yet so elaborate and beautiful and real.
it's like we see who we really are, and it's no longer frightening, it's no longer a distant figure never reached, a self we never get to become, it's already the deepest part of us. it's just hidden. by nothing heavier than a shadow.

"long enough." to keep just one thing without it becoming harmed,
or changed...or subject to our own changes.

"forever" and "temporary" seem equally impossible. that things end, that they might never end.

to say "nothing lasts" but unable to believe it,
the simple unbelievability of it
like knowing you were born once,
that beforehand you simply weren't.

to say "nothing lasts."
not words
or bones,
not aching
or changing.
no hardness.
no light.
no shapes,
things kept.

but it's raining now and the air is turning white.
and some things do last long enough.

:heart:
Reply
:iconrhyme-of-the-rain:
rhyme-of-the-rain Featured By Owner Aug 4, 2012  Student General Artist
oh, goodness, this made me feel.

if the melancholy rhythmic beating of the human heart formed words, oh, i believe they'd sound very much like this.
Reply
:iconantonfrost:
antonfrost Featured By Owner Aug 6, 2012   Writer
i'm glad!

:heart:
Reply
:iconkthecard:
KtheCard Featured By Owner Aug 4, 2012  Student Writer
holy shit holy shit holy shit.
this is the indelible beauty and sadness of the human memory. of the human heart. i love it. i love it. i love it. :heart:
Reply
:iconantonfrost:
antonfrost Featured By Owner Aug 4, 2012   Writer
"I am always sad, I think. Perhaps this signifies that I am not sad at all, because sadness is something lower than your normal disposition, and I am always the same thing. Perhaps I am the only person in the world, then, who never becomes sad. Perhaps I am lucky." --Alex, Everything Is Illuminated
:heart:
Reply
:iconpomohippie7:
pomohippie7 Featured By Owner Aug 3, 2012   Writer
Brilliant. Absolutely brilliant.
Reply
:iconantonfrost:
antonfrost Featured By Owner Aug 3, 2012   Writer
:heart:
Reply
Add a Comment:
 
×

:iconantonfrost: More from antonfrost


Featured in Collections

Devious Collection by ssleep

poems inspiring me to write my own by cristinewakesuphappy


More from DeviantArt



Details

Submitted on
August 3, 2012
File Size
3.0 KB
Link
Thumb

Stats

Views
4,242
Favourites
30 (who?)
Comments
28
×